free html hit counter
Standard Times New Bedford Ma Obituaries

So, you've stumbled upon the Standard Times New Bedford, MA obituaries, huh? Let's dive in, shall we? It's like the world's most fascinating game of 'Two Truths and a Lie', but with a dash of mortality thrown in. Don't worry, we'll keep it light!

Why New Bedford, You Ask?

Well, this little gem of a city in Massachusetts is no ordinary place. It's got a whopping 14 miles of coastline, which means it's got more water than a leaky bathtub. And get this, it's home to the largest collection of 19th-century commercial whaling ships in the world. Talk about a city with a rich... history. (See what I did there?)

Obituaries? Really?

Yep, you heard it right. Obituaries. But these aren't your grandma's obituaries. (No offense, Grandma.) The Standard Times has a knack for making these final farewells as unique as the folks they're honoring. It's like the ultimate roast, but with love and respect. (And a lot less roasting, because, you know, it's their last hurrah.)

Meet the Characters

Let's meet some of the stars of the show. There's John "Guitar" Welch, who played the blues so well, he made the devil himself say, "Nah, keep that guitar." And then there's Eleanor "Ellie" Johnson, who was so independent, she made the word 'feminist' seem like an understatement.

And who could forget Frank "The Whistler" O'Malley? This guy could whistle so beautifully, he made birds stop and say, "Dang, that's some good whistling." He even had a pet parrot who could whistle along. True story!

Funeral for New Bedford police officer Sgt. Michael CassidyFuneral for New Bedford police officer Sgt. Michael Cassidy

Quirky Facts Galore!

Now, you might be thinking, "These folks sound amazing, but what's the deal with their obituaries?" Well, let me tell you, these aren't your average, run-of-the-mill, "Beloved husband, father, and friend" affairs. No, no, no. These are obituaries that make you laugh, cry, and say, "Well, that's one way to go out."

Take Mary "The Prankster" Thompson, for example. Her obituary read like a comedy sketch, detailing her life of practical jokes and pranks. She even pulled off the ultimate prank on her own funeral, with a look-alike sitting in the front row, making everyone do a double-take. Now that's a send-off!

Funeral for New Bedford police officer Sgt. Michael CassidyFuneral for New Bedford police officer Sgt. Michael Cassidy

And the Award for Most Creative Obituary Goes to...

But the crown jewel of New Bedford obituaries has to be the one for Harold "The Time Traveler" Jenkins. This guy claimed to have traveled through time, and his obituary was written in the style of a news article from the year 3050. It detailed his adventures, his impact on future societies, and even mentioned a statue erected in his honor. Whether it was true or not, it sure made for one heck of a read.

So, Why the Fascination?

Well, friend, these obituaries are a testament to life. They remind us that everyone has a story, everyone has a unique spark that makes them, them. They're a celebration of the weird, the wonderful, and the downright wacky. And isn't that what life's all about?

So, next time you're feeling a bit down, or life seems a bit dull, remember these folks. Remember to live your life with passion, with humor, with a little bit of crazy. Because, as these obituaries show, life's too short not to have a little fun. And who knows? Maybe one day, you'll have an obituary that'll make people say, "Now that's how you do it!"